Therapy for Autism in Santa Monica, CA
You don’t need to be “more normal.” You need a world — and a therapist — who actually understands how your mind works.
If you’re on the spectrum, you’ve probably spent a lifetime being told, in ways big and small, that there’s a “right” way to be — a right way to socialize, to react, to feel, to exist in a room full of people. You’ve likely worked incredibly hard to meet that standard, often at a cost that no one else can see.
I want you to know: you don’t need to be fixed. You need support that understands your nervous system, honors how you actually experience the world, and helps you build a life that fits you.
Does any of this sound familiar?
Relationships feel hard to be present in, even when you care deeply. You want closeness. You want to feel connected to the people you love. But so often, emotional overwhelm or feeling fundamentally misunderstood gets in the way — and instead of feeling close, you feel far away, even sitting right next to someone. You leave conversations replaying them, wondering what you missed, wondering why connection feels like it takes so much more effort for you than it seems to for everyone else.
Masking has led to burnout, and burnout has led to wanting to disappear. The effort of holding it together — modulating your voice, your face, your reactions, your words — takes a real toll. Over time, that toll builds into something heavier: a exhaustion that makes you want to cancel plans, go quiet, retreat into your room and shut the door. It’s not that you don’t care about the people or things in your life. It’s that your battery is empty, and no one taught you how to recharge it in a sustainable way.
Bigger social settings drain you before they even start. Parties, work events, crowded restaurants, group hangouts — the anticipation alone can bring a wave of anxiety and dread. It’s not that you don’t want to connect with people. It’s that the sensory noise, the unspoken social rules, and the sheer amount of processing required leave you overstimulated and overwhelmed, often before you’ve even walked in the door.
Unfairness and lack of follow-through are hard to let go of. When others don’t listen, don’t cooperate, or don’t do things the way that makes sense — especially when something is being done unfairly or incorrectly — it can bring up real frustration, even anger. This isn’t about being rigid for the sake of it. It often comes from a deep, genuine investment in things being right, fair, and done well — and it’s disorienting when the people around you don’t seem to share that same standard.
And big life transitions can feel destabilizing in a way others don’t seem to understand. A breakup. A new job. A move. To everyone else, these might just be “normal life changes.” But for you, they can mean a total disruption to routine, predictability, and sense of self — bringing a level of anxiety and grief that can feel hard to explain to people who process change differently than you do.
If this resonates, please know: none of this means something is wrong with you. It means you’ve been navigating a world that wasn’t designed with your nervous system in mind — and you deserve support that actually is.
You’ve been told to “just act normal” or “be more social” — as if it were that simple. You’ve probably heard some version of this more times than you can count. It stings, because it implies you’re not already trying — when in reality, you might be trying harder than anyone around you realizes. Masking, adjusting, performing — it’s exhausting work that no one else can see, and being told to do more of it only deepens the disconnect between how you feel inside and what the world expects you to show.
Your body carries a lot, too. Stomach issues, sensitivities to certain foods or textures, physical discomfort that seems to flare up alongside emotional stress — these aren’t “all in your head.” The connection between your nervous system and your body is real, and it’s exhausting to manage both at once, especially when it feels like no one takes the physical piece seriously.
It doesn’t have to be this way.
You can learn skills to help you feel calm enough to move forward in a way that feels good, doesn’t consume your entire day, and doesn’t leave you with dread or exhaustion.
Autism is a beautiful gift and a superpower. You can often pay close attention to details, have very specialized skills, solve complex problems, and see things differently. These gifts should be used in a way that makes you feel good.
When we work together, we will focus on gaining an understanding of being neurodivergent and learn to celebrate your uniqueness rather than considering it something that needs fixing. My goal is to help you feel empowered to realize that you have special abilities that others do not possess. In addition, I want to help you learn ways to overcome challenges, such as dealing with change and life transitions, and entering social situations without being overwhelmed by emotions or shutting down.
You don’t have to suffer and let the vulnerabilities of Autism ruin your relationships or work/life balance. With therapy, you can find balance and peace of mind and learn to accomplish your goals without compromising your feelings or life values (i.e., family, work, creativity.)
If you’re looking for therapy for Autism Spectrum Disorder in Santa Monica, CA or online, let’s work together to improve your life. Contact me today for more information on how I can help.
How I Can Help
I work specifically with autistic adults, which means our work together starts from a place of understanding — not from trying to convince you that your experience is valid, or from pathologizing traits that are simply part of how your brain works. My goal isn’t to make you “more normal.” It’s to help you reduce distress, build sustainable coping tools, and create a life that genuinely fits who you are.
In our sessions, we’ll focus on practical, concrete skills for handling emotional overwhelm, social anxiety, and life transitions — along with deeper work on values, identity, and self-acceptance. I draw from several evidence-based approaches, adapted to fit your specific needs:
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
DBT offers concrete tools for managing intense emotions without becoming flooded by them. You’ll learn how to tolerate distress in overstimulating environments, how to regulate your nervous system when overwhelm hits, and how to stay grounded and present in relationships instead of shutting down or checking out. These are skills you can actually use in the moment — not abstract ideas, but real tools for real overwhelm.
Radically Open DBT (RO DBT)
RO DBT was specifically developed for people who tend toward over-control — a strong need for things to be done “the right way,” high standards for fairness and correctness, and difficulty being flexible when plans or people don’t cooperate. This approach helps address the frustration that builds when others don’t meet your standards, and works on flexibility, social signaling, and openness in a way that reduces isolation and increases genuine connection — without asking you to abandon your values around fairness and doing things well.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
ACT helps you build a different relationship with change, uncertainty, and anxiety — instead of fighting against them or getting stuck trying to avoid them entirely. We’ll work on making room for the discomfort that comes with transitions like a breakup, a new job, or a move, while still moving forward in ways that align with what actually matters to you. ACT also helps clarify your personal values — separate from what you’ve been told you should want — so that your choices, energy, and masking (when you choose it) are in service of a life that’s actually yours.
Together, these approaches let us work on multiple levels: regulating your nervous system in overstimulating situations, easing the fear and anxiety around change, and helping you feel more present and fulfilled in the relationships that matter to you — without requiring you to mask your way through it.
What This Can Look Like for You
Therapy with me isn’t about erasing who you are to fit in more easily. It’s about giving you tools to move through the world with less distress and more of yourself intact.
Over time, clients I work with often find that:
- Social situations feel more manageable, with real strategies for managing overstimulation and anxiety before, during, and after.
- Relationships start to feel less like something to survive and more like something to actually enjoy — with more presence, less overwhelm, and more genuine connection.
- Burnout becomes less frequent, because rest and recovery become part of the plan, not an afterthought.
- Frustration around fairness and follow-through becomes easier to work with, without needing to abandon the values underneath it.
- Life transitions — breakups, new jobs, moves — feel less destabilizing, with tools to manage the uncertainty and grief that come with change.
- The pressure to “just act normal” starts to lose its grip, replaced by a steadier sense of self-acceptance and permission to exist as you actually are.
This isn’t about becoming someone else. It’s about building a toolkit — for your emotions, your relationships, your nervous system, and your sense of self — so you can live a life that feels less exhausting and more aligned with who you truly are.
Resources for those with Autism and their families:
You Deserve Support That Actually Understands You
You’ve likely spent years adapting yourself to fit a world that wasn’t built with you in mind. That took real strength — but it shouldn’t have to be the only way you know how to survive.
If you’re ready for therapy that meets you with genuine understanding of the autistic experience, rather than trying to smooth out the parts of you that make you you — I’d love to work with you.